Ted Rall, why do you hate American Heros? Why do you hate Pat Tillman? Is it because he was more famous than you when he joined the Army to defend your freedom to draw political cartoons? Or was it the fact that he passed up an opportunity to make more money than you ever will to simply to something he thought was the right thing to do? Or do you simply hate all American soldiers? If that's true, you really should meet my Dad before passing judgment on him. Ted Rall, remember this: American soldiers have died for you in the past, American soldiers will die for to today and American soldiers will die for you in the future. You might want to honor and respect that. Or do you cling to your political views too tightly to see something bigger?

I got my jeep stuck in a ditch today. It was quite interesting. Not even 4wheel drive could get me out! Boy did I feel dumb and somewhat embarrased... espically because I probably didn't make such a good impression on the girls at the place I was going. Oh well. If I had known I was going to slide into the mud pit, I mean ditch, I would not have tried to park there. But I didn't know, so in I went. I'll see if I can get some pics up sometime. I felt bad, I didn't mean to steal all the attention away from my friend at her college graduation open house.

I want a job where I can work the day shift (and still pay the bills) so I can learn to swing dance and stretch out of my comfort zone and try taking girls out.

I want to buy a Nikon D70.

I know this is really asking a lot, but, I want the Royals to win more often!

I want you to be blessed by God and have an awesome day or night or whatever it is when you read this.

Someone using WebTV went to my webpage looking for "hot boobies." Boy I bet they were dissapointed when they got there!!

The Happy Happy Birthday Song
--------------
by The Arrogant Worms

Once a year we celebrate
With stupid hats and plastic plates
The fact that you were able to make
Another trip around the sun

And the whole clan gathers round
And gifts and laughter do abound
And we let out a joyful sound
And sing that stupid song

Happy birthday!
Now you're one year older!
Happy birthday!
Your life still isn't over!
Happy birthday!
You did not accomplish much
But you didn't die this year
I guess that's good enough

So let's drink to your fading health
And hope you don't remind yourself
The chance of finding fame and wealth
Decrease with every year

Does it feel like you're doing laps
And eating food and taking naps
And hoping that someday perhaps
Your life will hold some cheer

Happy birthday!
What have you done that matters?
Happy birthday!
You're starting to get fatter
Happy birthday!
It's downhill from now on
Try not to remind yourself
Your best years are all gone

If cryogenics were all free
Then you could live like Walt Disney
And live for all eternity
Inside a block of ice

But instead your time is set
This is the only life you get
And though it hasn't ended yet
Sometimes you wish it might

Happy birthday!
You wish you had more money
Happy birthday!
Your life's so sad it's funny
Happy birthday!
How much more can you take?
But your friends are hungry
So just cut the stupid cake

Happy birthday!
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday, dear...
(random calling out of names, including Ralph, Bill, Ralph Kramden,
Skippy, the bush kangaroo, and the b-b-b-b-b-bu-bu-bu- that leads into
"Dangerous")

Happy Birthday
--------------
by "Weird Al" Yankovic

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!

Well it's time to celebrate your birthday,
It happens every year.
We'll eat a lot of broccoli, and drink a lot of beer.
You should be good and happy that there's somethin' you can eat.
A million people every day are starvin' in the street.
Your daddy's in the gutter with the wretched and the poor.
Your mama's in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four.
There's garbage in the water,
There's poison in the sky.
I guess it won't be long before we're all gonna die!

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!

Well, what's the matter, little friend, you think this party is the pits?
Enjoy it while you can.
We'll soon be blown to bits!
The monkeys in the Pentagon are gonna cook our goose.
Their finger's on the button, all they need is an excuse.
It doesn't take a military genius to see
We'll all be Crispy Critters after World War III.
There's nowhere you can run to,
Nowhere you can hide.
When they drop the big one,
We all get fried.

Come on, boys and girls, sing along, okay?

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!

Well, there's a punk in the alley, and he's lookin' for a fight.
There's an Arab on the corner buyin' everything in sight.
There's a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed.
Seems that everywhere you look today, there's misery and greed.
I guess you know the Earth is gonna crash into the sun,
But that's no reason why we shouldn't have a little fun.
So if you think it's scary, if it's more than you can take,
Just blow out the candles,
And have a piece of cake.

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!

(wow!)

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!

And a pinch to grow an inch!

Good old Charlie Brown! I like this one. Maybe its because I think girls with red hair are particulary attractive. Maybe its because i've had a lot of nice girls move to far away places. Maybe its because I wish guys were aloud to cry infront of ladies and still be considered a man. Maybe its because Charlie and I have a couple things in common... our names and that girl we can't quite seem to figure out how to get ;)

A friend stoped by today and unplugged my basement drain with his basement drain unplugger! What a great birthday present! Now I can take showers and do my laundry again with out flooding the basement.

--------------------------------------

I've had no luck with:
friendster.com
friendsync.com
lavalife.com
But that's what I thought would happen. :) :)

---------------------------------------

Public education it's fun and it's free But it must not work just look at me -- Royal Ruckus

Well as of right now as I type this, 9 of the last 10 hits to this blog have come from: http://celester.blogspot.com/. Chris, your blog rules!

By the way (is that supposed to be spelled "by-the-way?) iTunes 4.5 is out now! If you thought iTunes 4.2 was slick, you ain't seen nothing yet! I'd ask everyone to sing happy birthday to iTunes with me, but I'm not good at singing. That didn't stop William Hung from getting his music on the iTunes Music Store though!

"Waffle King"
by "Weird Al" Yankovic
links by Inabeanpod

It took a lifetime, but I finally found
The perfect waffle recipe
You'll never find a batter any better in this whole stinkin' town
One little bite and I'm sure that you'll agree

Your eyes roll back and your knees get weak
Aw, you're gonna lick your plate clean
People come from miles around just to study my technique
I make the best darn waffles this world has ever seen

I'm the Waffle King (Waffle King)... yeah
Waffle King (Waffle King)
That's what they call me
Waffle King (Waffle King)
Hey, I'm the Waffle King

Everywhere I go now, the people cheer
I never have to wait in line
People say, "Right this way, sir... You're money's no good here"
Some day I betcha they'll build me a shrine

And everybody say, "Well, I'm your biggest fan!"
"I seen your picture in People Magazine!"
Folks come from around the world just to shake my hand
If you don't believe in the power of the waffle lemme show you just what I mean

I'm the Waffle King (Waffle King)
Make you want to scream and shout
Waffle King (Waffle King)
That's my name, don't wear it out
Waffle King (Waffle King)
Make no mistake about it
I'm the Waffle King... yeah

Roll out the red carpet, 'cause here I come
All you peons better scram
Out of my way now, you worthless piece of scum
Don't you know who I am?
Hey!

I wanna see you grovel, you waffle-eatin' fools
Everybody, on your knees
You wanna buy a waffle, you're playing by my rules
Go on, beg me... lemme hear you say "pretty please"

Can't you tell the universe revolves around me?
Don't you know you suckers owe me everything?
And can't you see that I'm the highest form of life that there could ever be?
Everybody all around the world, stand up and sing
Come on now...

Waffle King
Hey batter batter
Waffle King
Hot on your platter
Waffle King
Say, what's the matter
Don't you know who I am?
Don't you know who I am?
Tell 'em, girls
(He's the Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Waffle King)
Yeah yeah
(He's the Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Waffle King)
Tell the truth now
(He's the Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Waffle King)
Don't you know who I am?
Don't you know who I am?

How did I get access to Gmail before you did you ask?

click here to see!

RealNetworks CEO: iTunes DRM is 'Soviet model'
April 20, 2004 - 22:14 EDT

At the National Association of Broadcasters (NAB) show in Las Vegas today, RealNetworks CEO Rob Glaser took aim at Apple and its digital rights management (DRM) on songs downloaded from the iTunes Music Store. "It's kind of a Soviet model," said Glaser, referring to Apple's closed environment. "Taking secure music off the PC is a morass of incompatibility. This is not going to fly in the mainstream market." Last week, it was reported that Glaser had sent Apple CEO Steve Jobs an e-mail suggesting that the two companies form a tactical alliance against Microsoft in the digital music business. Jobs apparently rebuffed the offer.

Rob, if Apple's a bunch of pinko commie pig dogs, why did you want to join them in the first place? Or would they not be pinko commie pig dogs if Apple had let you in? Silly boy!